An update for Meg

This is a little story about how much an idiot I truly am.
Ok, ready? Here goes.

I finally gave up on having "the talk". Instead, I had a few drinks and wrote down everything I wanted to say in a letter. Lame, yes, but what can you do?

I eventually had the chance to give it to her, and went for it. As I put it in her hand, I believe my exact words were "here, just take it, don't ask because I don't know, you can make fun of me for it later. I'm crazy."
And I walked away.

As I waited at the bus stop I noticed something in my pocket, and went to pull it out. It was the letter. Hmm.

Now what did I actually give her? I don't know, probably some notes I'd taken during work I suppose. All that waiting and I still hadn't given it to her.

I saw her the next day and she didn't say a word about the whole incident. And she left without saying goodbye so I missed my chance again. So this morning I went to work, and left it at the bar where I knew she'd find it. I don't expect to get a phonecall, or even a real talk. But it's now done and over with. I got out what I wanted to say, sort of, and that's all I wanted really.

So there.

10 second movie in a night long dream

Last night I had a dream about a movie.
You played the part of the queen,
The queen falling from grace,
Losing her mind and giving it all up
Before it was even hers.

There were no lines to speak of.
Just a change in your smile,
The looks of disappointment in your followers,
And your complete apathy
That was all I needed to understand.

we lay together, just not too close

Hi folks, me again.

Life goes on.
Last week I worked 70 hours, due to it being rather busy, what with it being mother's day on Sunday and whatnot.
On Monday my boss gave me a few encouraging words, saying he trusted me with certain things that he's never trusted anybody with in all the years he's been there, and that I take initiative, and do my job well, and have a good future with the company if I want it. I needed that boost for sure. Seeing as my personal life is the shits right now. Love life anyways.

The girl continues to avoid me. I've left messages, and told her to call me (in person) and still nothing, outside of work anyways. And I really don't want to have 'the talk' there. I wrote it all out in a fucking letter, because that's how I am. We're supposed to be having drinks with a couple of other coworkers tonight, so I'll probably maybe give it to her then, if she actually comes.

It'd be alot easier just to not care, but unfortunately I do.

I'll add more later, maybe, I've got company.

Going to see Lifehouse next month. Sweet.

This is ours, Don't waste it

Today I tried Wasabi flavoured potato chips, and the new coke (at least up north), black cherry vanilla.
The chips were weird, but kind of good. In small doses anyways.
The coke tasted like vanilla coke with an almost non existant cherry taste.
I also some sort of frozen General Tsao's Chicken dinner. So it was an experimental afternoon.

I like the new Taking Back Sunday single. I also like Kelly Clarkson's latest, but whatever.

Last night I went out for a couple of drinks with a couple of people from work, because that's what I do lately. Drink. Everyday. If I wasn't out with them I would have been drinking alone at home. So yes, I rule. Ok, no really.

Our last conversation..
Her: "Do you want a hug?"
insert hugging here
Me: "We still need to talk eh"
Her: "Yes, you smell good though"

What? And she's off to Kingston again. I'm driving myself nuts


Empty light beams
Highway snapshots passing by
Shining through the window
Shining through another night
Hollowed out with far too many empty thoughts
And sleepless turns
It kind of blurs all together
And I can't remember a thing